ex-lion tamer

celebrate and mourn dear friends: r@d@r the ex-lion tamer has a new J-O-B job with benefits and a steady paycheck for the first time in 1.5 years.

PROS:

1) Ability to afford to feed, clothe, and house my child

2) Can now afford new glasses to replaced the scratched up ones that are killing my eyes right now

3) It’s a job working at an academic institution founded by the Jesuits, one of my favorite eeeviiilll conspiracies

CONS:

1) Must now put the kid in day care, which is depressing, nightmarish and expensive

2) Continuing my involvement in the very same monetary system I had hoped to one day destroy

3) “Work is for suckers” - quote apocryphally attributed to Al Capone, now anonymously in the Anarchist public domain

so while i have some reason to feel relieved, i am also somewhat in shock.  in many ways, my period of unemployment was traumatic, but perhaps only for 2 reasons: (1) work is an addiction in our culture, and going more or less cold turkey was like trying to quit heroin - very debilitating; (2) our culture ostracizes, marginalizes, oppresses and belittles the jobless, so it’s very hard to maintain one’s dignity in that state unless one has an immensely rigid ego structure.  i think i’m going to be numb for awhile before any sort of jubilation sets in.  in many respects it’s a good job, for a person like me.  it certainly isn’t the far-leftist sex-positive gender-busting culture-jamming street theater i would have hoped it could be, but it’s at least a place i can feel to be having a “less bad” impact on the psychosocial environment.