confidential to…(you know who you are)

about a week ago, i finally got it that your web handle is not your real name, but is in fact a pun that i was somehow too stupid to get even though it’s not beyond your average eleven year old. i then realize why it is that you responded to the “are you related to the _____ i went to elementary school with” email with a polite and genteel silence. your mercy is bountiful. as is my undying shame. now if you will excuse me – i am going to pound in my forehead with a brick.

i should laugh – and it is actually very funny – but i am not what you would consider a “secure” person. so if you don’t mind i’m going to spend the next few months silently pondering the generous wellspring that is my dumbassedness.